A good consideration before beating your child.

EMAIL: Take care of ur parents

A simple man tells how his booking an air ticket for his father, his first flight, brought emotions and made him realize that how much we all take for granted when it comes to our parents.
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My parents left for our native place on Thursday and we went to the airport to see them off. In fact, my father had never traveled by air before, so I just took this opportunity to make him
experience the same. In spite of being asked to book tickets by train, I got them tickets on
MAS.
The moment I handed over the tickets to him, he was surprised to see that I had booked them by air. The excitement was very apparent on his face, waiting for the time of travel. Just like a
school boy, he was preparing himself on that day and we all went to the airport, right from using the trolley for his luggage, the baggage check-in and asking for window seat and waiting restlessly for the security check-in to happen. He was thoroughly enjoying himself and I, too, was overcome with joy watching him experience all these things.
As they were about to go in for the security check-in, he walked up to me with tears in his eyes and thanked me. He became very emotional and it was not as if I had done something great but the fact that this meant a great deal to him.
When he said thanks, I told him there was no need to thank me. But later, thinking about the entire incident, I looked back at my life. As a child how many dreams our parents have made come true. Without understanding the financial situation, we ask for football, dresses, toys, outings, etc. Irrespective of their affordability, they have satisfied to all our needs. Did we ever think about the sacrifices they had to make to accommodate many of our wishes?
Did we ever say thanks for all that they have done for us?
Same way, today when it comes to our children, we always think that we should put them in a good school. Regardless of the amount of donation, we will ensure that we will have to give the child the best, theme parks, toys, etc. But we tend to forget that our parents have sacrificed a lot for our sake to see us happy, so it is our responsibility to ensure that their dreams are realized and what they failed to see when they were young, it is our responsibility to ensure that they experience all those and their life is complete.
Many times, when my parents had asked me some questions, I have actually answered back without patience. When my daughter asks me something, I have been very polite in answering. Now I realize how they would have felt at those moments.
Let us realize that old age is a second childhood and just as we take care of our children, the same attention and same care need to be given to our parents and elders.
Rather than my dad saying thank you to me, I would want to say sorry for making him wait so long for this small dream. I do realize how much he has sacrificed for my sake and I will do my best to give the best possible attention to all their wishes. Just because they are old does
not mean that they will have to give up everything and keep sacrificing for their grandchildren also. They have wishes, too.

i got diarrhea again!

not again.. last month i just had a servere case of loose motion. now, it's back! why is my system so weak!!

so this is what i should and should not eat.. sigh..

Until diarrhea subsides, try to avoid milk products and foods that are greasy, high-fiber, or very sweet. These foods tend to aggravate diarrhea.
As you improve, you can add soft, bland foods to your diet, including bananas, plain rice, boiled potatoes, toast, crackers, cooked carrots, and baked chicken without the skin or fat. For children, the pediatrician may recommend what is called the BRAT diet: bananas, rice, applesauce, and toast.
For children, doctors often recommend a special rehydration solution that contains the nutrients they need. You can buy this solution in the grocery store without a prescription. Examples include Pedialyte, Ceralyte, and Infalyte.

so another round of plain meals for me..

小朋友的延緩報償

作者﹕鄭石岩

我的孩子念幼稚園時，禮拜六、禮拜天，偶爾會帶孩子逛百貨公司，順便買些東西，逛逛書店。

出發前我會跟孩子說：「明天我們去逛百貨公司，你們想不想去？」「想去！」

我說：「去的時候，當然會帶你們到玩具部，但是如果你們不講理，到時候在那個地方耍賴，那麼你最好不要去，能夠約束自己的人才去。」

他們說：「我們要跟你一起去。」

「好極了，那就必須講好，爸爸和媽媽都是上班族，一共只有這些錢，不能超支，所以我們出去時先買吃的、穿的、用的和文具，這是用錢的優先順序，對不對？」

「對！」「再來就是買你們的玩具。」「對！」

我又說：「如果有剩錢，一定會去買玩具，我們儘可能多留一點錢，不會疏忽玩具的。如果最後我們的錢買不起玩具，那就要衡量我們剩下的經費來買，這樣贊不贊成？」

他們齊聲說：「贊成！」第二天就高高興興、浩浩蕩蕩的出發了。

出發前我還會先徵詢：「如果想省一點、多留一錢買玩具，我們就不搭計程車，坐公車去。」

孩子想一想說：「坐公車、坐公車。」節省的精神就出來了。

一路上我們有說有笑、高高興興的在街上散步，到了百貨公司，東西都買好了，就一起到玩具部去。

快到玩具部之前，我總是會蹲下來提醒他們，別忘了我們現在只有這些錢了，如果你要買玩具超過我們的預算，我們就可以把錢省下來，下次來時再積兩次結餘的錢來買。

他們就問：「老爸，那你一共還有多少錢？」

我就說：「你看看，就這麼多。」這樣一來，他們很快就學會算術了。

一進去，他們看完後說：「老爸，我要買搖控汽車，那一部車子我最喜歡。」

我問：「好啊，可是我們今天的錢夠不夠？」

「不夠。」

「那怎麼辦？我出一個點子好不好？」

「好。」

「那我們就盡情的把所有的玩具，看個過癮再回家。我們今天就不買玩具了，下一次我們儘量剩錢來買那個玩具，可能要分兩次或三次的結餘，才有辦法買，這樣好不好？」

他說：「好！」 於是我們專心的欣賞玩具。

看完後再問他們：「買不買？」 他們說：「不買。」

我覺得不好意思，就說：「那個小老鼠一隻才五塊錢，我們買一隻好不好？」

他們說：「好吧，也好。」就各買一隻玩具小老鼠。到了百貨公司門口，

我說：「你們表現得太好了，我們到地下室買根棒棒糖鼓勵自己。」就一人拿了一根棒棒糖，高高興興、浩浩蕩蕩的準備回家。

「現在是搭計程車好呢？還是坐公車好？」

他們說：「坐公車好。老爸，這個錢要省下來，是要買那個玩具的哦！」

小孩子從這樣的活動裡學會了如何累積、如何節省，甚至學會了一種很重要的習慣 ─ 延緩報償的習慣，不會非要不可。

一個人如果看上了一樣樣東西就非要不可，那是一種很大性格缺憾，台灣話叫「破格」，是很不好的。

我們要慢慢的從生活當中，去培養孩子基本的生活習慣，他就學會負責，知道自己該負起什麼樣的責任。

隔了一段時間，孩子都長大了，不願跟我們一起去百貨公司。

有次我和太太去逛百貨公司，兩個人逛呀逛的就到了玩具部，我看到了驚心動魄的一幕。

有個媽媽抬高聲音說：「上個禮拜才買，這個禮拜又要買。」

儼然在告訴大家，我的孩子不講理，我不給他買原因是上個禮拜才買過，不是不買給他。

我覺得這個媽媽有點心虛，不給孩子買玩具有什麼好丟臉的？不買就是不買，要講清楚，可是她的方式有點走樣，這個孩子又非要不可，她就拖著他走，那個孩子兩隻腳蹬著不走，她就啪啪兩下好響亮、好清脆的耳光，孩子哇的哭了起來，她拖著他慢慢消失在人群中。

我看到那一幕，感覺到很多父母，不了解怎麼帶孩子，所以我一直希望天下的父母都能知道怎麼把孩子帶好，建立一個讓每個孩子都有信心，能夠在生活上適應得很好的社會。

Birth Order

courtesy of http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com/development/birth_order.htm

The following characteristics will not apply to all children in every family. Typical characteristics, however, can be identified:

Birth Order	Typical Characteristics
Only Child	Pampered and spoiled. Feels incompetent because adults are more capable. Is center of attention; often enjoys position. May feel special. Self-centered. Relies on service from others rather than own efforts Feels unfairly treated when doesn't get own way. May refuse to cooperate. Plays "divide and conquer" to get own way.
First Child	Is only child for period of time; used to being center of attention. Believes must gain and hold superiority over other children. Being right, controlling often important. May respond to birth of second child by feeling unloved and neglected. Strives to keep or regain parents' attention through conformity. If this failed, chooses to misbehave. May develop competent, responsible behavior or become very discouraged. Sometime strives to protect and help others. Strives to please.
Second Child	Never has parents' undivided attention. Always has sibling ahead who's more advanced. Acts as if in race, trying to catch up or overtake first child. If first child is "good," second may become "bad." Develops abilities first child doesn't exhibit. If first child successful, may feel uncertain of self and abilities. May be rebel. Often doesn't like position. Feels "squeezed" if third child is born. May push down other siblings.
Middle Child of Three	Has neither rights of oldest nor privileges of youngest. Feels life is unfair. Feels unloved, left out, "squeezed." Feels doesn't have place in family. Becomes discouraged and "problem child" or elevates self by pushing down other siblings. Is adaptable. Learns to deal with both oldest and youngest sibling.
Youngest Child	Behaves like only child. Feels every one bigger and more capable. Expects others to do things, make decisions, take responsibility. Feels smallest and weakest. May not be taken seriously. Becomes boss of family in getting service and own way. Develops feelings of inferiority or becomes "speeder" and overtakes older siblings. Remains "The Baby." Places others in service. If youngest of three, often allies with oldest child against middle child.

NOTES: 1. The middle child of three is usually different from the middle child of a large family. The middle children of large families are often less competitive as parents don't have as much time to give each child and so the children learn to cooperate to get what they want. 2. Only children usually want to be adults, and so don't relate to peers very well. When they become adults, they often believe they've finally "made it" and can now relate better to adults as peers. 3. During their formative years, only children live primarily in the world of adults. They must learn how to operate in the big people's world as well as how to entertain themselves. Thus they often become very creative in their endeavors. (Adapted from Don Dinkmeyer, Gary D. McKay, and Don Dinkmeyer, Jr., Parent Education Leader's Manual Coral Springs, F:; CMTI Press, 1978)

好!!!

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日前在聯合副刊看到一篇讀者投書，作者叫佳佳.內容如下:

有一對父母,他們的小孩大學畢業,上班了，有了收入,所以父母不再給零用錢，
可是入了社會的小孩.用好的吃好的.追流行.錢根本不夠用.結果丟了一句話給父母
"如果你們不能一輩子供給我優渥的生活，那為什麼從小要讓我養成這種習慣?........."

看了打了個冷顫
我們是不是也是這樣的父母?
我們要怎樣教我們的孩子愛物惜物?

我今年二十歲，目前因故休學，在一家安親班打工。
安親班鄰近便利商店，孩子很喜歡去那裡買東西。

常見包子吃一口就丟，飲料喝半罐就不要.

洋芋片才吃兩片，就買一包別的來吃。
這些孩子平常也喜歡偷藏別人的東西開玩笑，愛看人家著急的神情。

我曾多次制止，他們卻毫不覺得不妥，甚至腦筋還動到我的火車月票上。

我生活一向儉約，身上很少帶超過五十元。

失去月票，我回不了家，只能投宿朋友家.

而我怎樣也沒有想到--竟是他們偷拿我的東西！
他們非常聰明，一直等到月票過期了才拿出來還給我。

我說，這種行為是不對的，我會寫在聯絡簿上告知家長。

這些孩子竟然從錢包掏出兩千元摔在我面前：

「小氣鬼，才兩千，賠妳就是了！」
「才」兩千元嗎？

我還不到可以老氣橫秋地說

「我們那個年代啊……」的年紀，

我也沒嘗過貧窮的滋味，

但那兩千元也是我辛苦從生活費中儉省下來的，是我半個月的生活費啊!

這些孩子竟然可以這麼不屑地從錢包?

掏出來摔在我面前！


這讓我想起之前某一次當家教，

我看那個孩子家中並非十分富裕，

醫科生的我，時薪是可以索價五百到七百元的，但我只要了時薪三百元。

我認真地教他，無奈學生不用心，

總是想聊天，不想聽課，

後來竟挑明了說：

「要不是我媽說,上妳一小時課.給我五百元，我才不想聽妳講這些無聊東西呢！」


原來請我當家教，比請他當學生便宜多了！
我不知道這些孩子的家庭是否真的很富裕，但他們生活的態度簡直像暴發戶。


這樣對孩子好嗎？

父母不能供應孩子一輩子!

是不是應教會"孩子節儉".比期望孩子以後能賺大錢.維持闊綽生活，可實際多了。


昨天我在教室的白板上心痛地寫下：

「一粥一飯，當思來處不易；

半絲半縷，恆念物力維艱。」

這是一個很古老的諺語，但我不認為這不合時代。


教給孩子這個美德，是留給他們一項比萬貫家財還要重要的資產。


因為自己.小時候過得辛苦，便盡量給孩子好日子過的家長"請深思"，這樣究竟是愛孩子，還是害了孩子。



捨不得孩子吃苦，將來他會更苦！
許多父母養小孩是把孩子捧在手心上，怕他凍著、怕他餓著、摔著．．．
其實這種過度的保護，

只會讓他更低能、更依賴、更不知如何面對人生的大風大浪。

Using the Internet to Step-Out of The Mommy Box

http://mommycommunity.com/index.php/2008/06/09/298/ - saw this in my newsletter email. share with me your thoughts!

• How long have you been using the internet?
• Can you remember the first time you were introduced to the internet, what were your thoughts then?
• How has the internet changed your life?
• What benefits do you see the internet having on “mom-users”?
• How can moms use the internet to “Step-out of their box”?
• If you were meeting an Internet “newbie mom” for the first time - what are the top tips you would share with her about the internet?
• Is it possible for moms to connect with others via the internet and really form a friendship?
• What are some places you can recommend moms to check out to expand their horizon?

parenting is an art

Parenting is an art, not science.
parenting is an art, not science, no formula to follow. if others has succeed, you are NOT garenteed success if copied their style. as long as the kid is happy, everyday are eager to open their eyes for a brand new day, you are on the right track.

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Baby Bottle Tooth Decay

Baby Bottle Tooth Decay / Early Childhood Caries

Inappropriate feeding of children can lead to a typical nursing pattern decay. One term used for this type of caries is Baby Bottle Tooth Decay (BBTD), others include nursing bottle caries, nursing caries, bottle caries, infant caries, early childhood caries etc…
This is a very devastating type of tooth decay for the young patients, their parents, and the pediatric dentist. Overall water fluoridation and other methods of fluoride application have resulted in reduction of caries rates. BBTD persists as a decay pattern and requires our special attention.
Early recognition and intervention are essential to successful treatment and prevention of disease progression.
Caries is an infectious disease. Several factors need to be combined to develop caries.

1. teeth need to be present
2. bacteria need to be present
3. a substrate (food for the bacteria) needs to be present
4. caries requires time to develop

These are the major factors involved in the caries process. The combination of the factors leads to disease, if one or more factors are missing disease may not develop.

Teeth

Primary teeth usually start to erupt in the first year of life. The first teeth to erupt at approximately 6 months are the lower central incisors followed by the upper central incisors. At 12 months usually all lower incisors and all upper incisors are erupted. The eruption time is highly variable and I am not concerned about variations of up to 6 months.

Bacteria

One of the important bacteria in dental caries is streptococcus mutans. S. mutans does not appear in the oral cavity of infants until after tooth eruption. S.mutans itself does not adhere to the teeth very well, it requires other plaque forming bacteria for initial colonization. Most likely infants become infected from their parents, siblings or other individuals with close contact. Usually the mother is considered to be the source. Infants whose mothers harbor very high levels of s.mutans (mothers that have a very high caries risk and rate) become colonized more readily than infants of mothers with low s.mutans levels in their saliva. A minimum infective dose is necessary to develop caries. Disease prevention should include preventive therapy for the parents. "We all have bad teeth" may actually mean we all have the same bacteria.

Substrate The substrate for s.mutans comes from juice, milk, formula, or any other liquid sweetened with fermentable carbohydrates. Commercially available sugar teas lead to rampant infant caries in Germany in the 70s and 80s ("Zuckerteekaries"). A favorite trick among parents in the UK used to be to thicken vitamin syrups with honey or other sugar syrup to ensure long feeding. The pacifier dipped in honey is another bad habit. Honey needs to be avoided in the first year of life. It has been associated with cases of infantile botulism. The botulism spores have also been detected in commercial corn syrups. One thing I recently saw in the U.S. are baby bottles with soda labels. Unfortunately I have also seen children with soda in their bottle.

Time

Bacteria and substrate need to be present for a prolonged time to allow demineralization and caries progression. The bottle at nap time or bedtime is most dangerous. Fluids may pool around the teeth for hours. The teeth primarily affected by that are the maxillary incisors. Lower teeth are in general less affected since they are covered by the tongue.
Nursing pattern decay has also been reported with prolonged and unrestricted nighttime breast-feeding. The stagnation of milk about the neck of anterior teeth and the fermentation of the disaccharide lactose, a sugar found in milk, contribute to this caries process. Under usual feeding regimens neither bottle nor breast milk predispose to caries.
The typical high risk child will use a nursing bottle far beyond the first birthday. If infants are allowed prolonged access to the bottle its use may become habitual. The result is the toddler that is never seen without a bottle. These children may have a very high inappropriate caloric intake or the high fluid intake may cause the child to keep away from other foods, which leads to an overall poor nutritional outcome.
Weaning from the bottle or breast during the "terrible twos" can be extremely challenging. This struggle can be avoided by making the transition to the cup earlier in life, preferably shortly before or after the first birthday. At 4 to 6 months of age infants develop muscle control to close the mouth and may be introduced to nonliquid foods and the cup.
Bottle feeding past 12 months of age leads to a drastically increased caries risk.

• infants should not be put to sleep with a bottle containing a liquid other than water
• infants should be encouraged to drink from a cup prior to their first birthday
• infants should be weaned from the bottle at 12-14 months of age
• infants should start to supplement their diet with nonliquids at 4-6 months of age
• juices should only be offered from a cup
• oral hygiene should be started with eruption of the first primary tooth
• within six month of eruption of the first tooth (no later than the first birthday) it is time for the first dental visit

Treatment The treatment options for established BBTD vary depending on how far the disease has progressed. Very early detection of demineralization on teeth, chalky white spots or lines, may allow to remineralize teeth with fluoride application and diet modification. The first dental visit will help to evaluate your child's caries risk . Your pediatric dentist will discuss methods of disease prevention. If obvious decay is present full coverage of the teeth with stainless steel crowns or veneered crowns is indicated. Adhesive fillings have generally a very poor prognosis on anterior primary teeth as far a retention and recurrent decay are concerned. If decay reaches the pulp chamber pulp therapy or extractions will need to be considered. Space maintenance is in general not necessary (anterior primary teeth are usually spaced, space maintenance is a concern for posterior primary teeth). Young pre-cooperative children may need sedation or general anesthesia to accomplish treatment. Your pediatric dentist will be able to discuss with you which behavior management option is the best for your child. Source - http://home.flash.net/~dkennel/bottle.htm, http://www.ada.org/public/topics/decay_childhood_faq.asp

Which Lovely Baby Are You?

--JANUARY BABY:--
Pretty/handsome. Loves dressing up.
Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows
emotions. Takes time to recover when
hurt. Sensitive. Down-to-Earth.
Stubborn.

--FEBRUARY BABY:--
Loves reality. Intelligent.
Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble.
Honest and loyal. Determined to reach
goals. Rebellious when restricted. Too
sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry
easily but does not show it. Loves
making friends but rarely shows it.
Ambitious. Loves entertainment and
leisure. Romantic on the inside.

--MARCH BABY:--
Affectionate and secretive. Naturally
honest, generous and sympathetic.
Loves peace and serenity.
Sensitive towards others. Great
kisser. Easily angered. Trustworthy.
Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant.

--APRIL BABY:--
Humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative.
Calm, kind and sympathetic. Loyal. Does
work well with others. Very confident.
Sensitive. Able to cheer everyone up
and/or make them laugh. Able to
motivate oneself and others.
Understanding. Fun to be around.
Hyper. Loves sports, music, leisure and
travelling. Systematic.

--MAY BABY:--
Stubborn, strong-willed and
highly motivated. Easily angered.
Attracts others and loves attention.
Beautiful physically and mentally.
Firm, and needs no motivation. Shy
towards opposite sex. Easily consoled.
Loves to dream. Understanding. Loves
literature and the arts. Restless.
Hardworking.

--JUNE BABY:--
Loves to make new friends and be
outgoing. Great flirt. Has a great
choice in films, and may one day
become a famous actor/actress.

--JULY BABY:--
Fun to be with but difficult to
understand. Quiet unless excited or
tensed. Honest. Concerned about
people's feelings, is friendly and
approachable. Temperamental and
unpredictable. Easily hurt but
recovers quickly. Forgives but never
forgets. Treats others equally.
Hardworking. Loves to be loved.

--AUGUST BABY:--
Outgoing. Takes risks. No self-
control. Kind-hearted and self-
confident. LOUD and VERY revengeful.
Easy to get along with and talk to.
Likes talking and singing. Loves
music. Easily distracted. Hates not
being trusted. BIG imagination. Loves
to be loved. Hates studying. In need
of 'that someone'. Rebellious when
restricted. Playful. Stubborn and
curious. Independent. A fighter.

--SEPTEMBER BABY:--
Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty
but tends to regret. Attractive and
affectionate to oneself. Strong
mentality. Loves attention. Consoling,
friendly and solves people's problems.
Usually has many friends. Emotional.

--OCTOBER BABY:--
Loves to chat. Loves those who love
them. Has both inner and physical
beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets
angry often. Treats friends
importantly. Always making friends.
Easily hurt but recovers easily.
Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does
not care to control emotions.
Unpredictable. Extremely smart.

--NOVEMBER BABY:--
Trustworthy and loyal. Wild at times.
Knows how to have fun. Playful, but
secretive. Very emotional
and temperamental sometimes. Fearless
and independent. Can hold their
ownselves. Stands out in a
crowd. Essentially very smart.

--DECEMBER BABY:--
Preety/Handsome.Loyal and generous.
Competitive
in everything. Impatient and hasty.
Ambitious. Fun to be with. Easy to
talk to, though hard to understand.
Easily influenced by kindness. Polite
and soft-spoken. Choosy and always
wants the best. Temperamental.
Friendly. Able to show character.
Loveable. Easily hurt. Loves music.

感恩：陪伴我們走過一生的人

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